Courtney Coogan ? It's the bastard offspring you hope would only appear at the end of horror movies surrounded by pitchfork wielding peasants. Courtney Love claims to be pregnant by comic actor Steve Coogan. She claims they had a two week shag fest when they met at a hotel. The unremittingly dim Courtney said, "He forced me into some very unsafe sexual practices, I hope he hasn't given me anything." Apart from the baby ? This got me thinking, the world would be a much stranger place if rock chicks kept falling for strange comedians, now I can't do photoshop so you'll just have to imagine what the offspring of these pairings might looks like, I have and it's keeping me awake at nights.... Spike Milligan and Bette Midler. It hardly bears thinking about, better drowned at birth. Ken Dodd an K D Lang, so for reasons of Lang's sexuality this is most unlikely of pairings, but just think, "How tickled I am to get to put a bun in your oven." This though is the terrible thought that kept me writhing in bed, clutching the duvet for comfort and shouting, "NO, NO, IT CANNOT BE TRUE" in a wild and anguished manner, can you for a moment imagine the horror that would be birthed if.... .....Marty Feldman had lain with Tina Turner, send for those pitchfork wielding peasants right away.